How many marriages happen just because "the parents approved," without considering if the woman really agrees? How many women feel forced to accept arranged marriages because they're too scared to defy their family? In cultures where parental approval is seen as the only thing that matters, Islam provides clear and firm guidelines about women's rights in marriage.
Women Have the Right to Choose Their Husbands
Words of the Prophetﷺ
A widow has more authority over herself than her guardian, and for a virgin, her father must ask for her permission.
Book8Ch.9No.3307
Muslim. (2018) Sahih Muslim. Translated by A. Hameed Siddiqui.
When the Prophet Canceled a Forced MarriageNarrated by Khansa' bint Khidam Al-Ansariya: Her father had married her off while she was a widow, but she was unhappy with the marriage. She then came to the Prophet (ﷺ) to complain, and he declared the marriage invalid.
Marriage Must Be with the Woman's ConsentNarrated by Khansa' bint Khidam Al-Ansariya: The Prophet (ﷺ) said, "A widow must not be married off unless her opinion is asked, and a virgin must not be married off unless her permission is sought." The companions asked, "O Messenger of Allah, how do we know her permission?" He replied, "Her silence is her permission."
The Prophet ﷺ taught that if an unmarried girl stays silent when asked about a marriage proposal, her silence is understood as consent because she's too shy to verbally say "yes." The silence being referred to is silence from shyness, not silence from fear or being forced. This silence must also be without any indication of refusal, no crying, anger, or anything that shows she's unwilling. If she shows any sign of disagreement, whether through words or body language, that's not consent and the marriage cannot go forward. But this doesn't mean a girl can be pressured into staying quiet. Rather, the hadith shows how the Prophet ﷺ respected the modest nature of young women while still making absolutely sure her consent was real and freely given, not forced.
In particular communities, there may be strong pressure to marry the family's choice, "This is my friend's child, good family, financially stable, you two are perfect for each other." But the child doesn't know them, feels no connection, or isn't even interested. Yet out of fear of disappointing their parents or being labeled disobedient, they feel forced to agree. The hadith above makes it clear that women have the right to refuse forced marriage, and must be asked for their opinion and consent before marriage.
Parents often say, "We know what's best for you. This is for your future." And their intentions may be good. But good intentions don't justify forcing someone into marriage. Marriage is a lifelong commitment that the child will live, not the parents. So the person who has the most right to decide is the one who will actually live in that marriage.
Forced Marriage Is Very Dangerous Forced marriage is one of the factors that increases the likelihood of suicidal thoughts among women. Additionally, forced marriage is a form of social control that undermines women's freedom, causing them to feel trapped and hopeless because they lose the right to determine their own lives.